Big Talkers

Illustration by James Flames

Scan the extracurricular listings of any newspaper or weekly magazine, and one group will likely be there — the Toastmasters. In Hendersonville, the Four Seasons chapter meets weekly at the Lake Point Landing auditorium, while in other communities they might meet in cafes or churches. Asheville has three chapters, and larger cities often have more. The group has spread from London to New Delhi, and elsewhere across the globe. But who exactly are the Toastmasters? Enthusiasts for hot, crisp bread? Social drinkers who love to clink glasses in honor of their colleagues? Not quite.

Bold Life sent a reporter to the Four Seasons Toastmaster meeting and a found a group that simply gathers once per week to hone their public speaking and leadership skills. Like all chapters, they follow a regular format that keeps the pace moving. Members take turns running the show. The mood is friendly and encouraging.

Those who join Toastmasters tend to be people on the rise in their careers or in public life, said Richard Day, membership director of the Four Seasons Toastmasters. "If you can't public speak, you can't compete," he said before the meeting.

Toastmaster Sharon Nix Rimas Zailskas

Of course, for many people, public speaking ranks right up there with paying taxes and visiting the dentist. Despite that, the Toastmasters somehow make public speaking fun.

The Four Seasons meeting began with a short prayer and the Pledge of Allegiance. That week's official Toastmaster, Sharon Nix, a real estate agent, started things off with a little levity.

"Susan told me this lectern was too small for me, and I meant to bring a step stool but I forgot," Nix said.

If the self-deprecation wasn't enough to ease any nervous speakers, another member stood up to tell the weekly joke. To paraphrase, a woman discussing her dying wishes says she doesn't want to be kept living with any "machines or bottles of fluids." The punchline: her friend unplugs the television and pours her wine down the sink.

But seriously, folks... Next up, two members delivered short, rehearsed speeches.

Toastmaster Mike David Rimas Zailskas

New member Mike David walked to the podium first. He sighed nervously and fidgeted with his glasses. "There's that fear thing I was talking about earlier," he said. For a moment, his anxiety traveled through the room like a subtle electrical current. But then he dived into his "Icebreaker," a standard, beginner Toastmasters speech designed to tell the club a little about oneself. He talked about growing up in a high-crime neighborhood in Boston, following his father's footsteps in the military, and then angering his father by quitting the union to become an independent contractor. They didn't talk for 10 years before reconciling, he said.

It was as much a speech about discovering one's own path, and finding "joy and happiness in everything you do," as much as it was about himself. He received a standing ovation after the speech.

David needs to constantly network as a health and wellness products salesperson and a security/telecommunications contractor, he said after the meeting. "When you're talking to that many people, sometimes you lose focus," he said. "I joined to develop a train of thought and to get better at speaking fluently."

The next speaker, Jewell Edney, was a little more experienced. As members progress, they delve into more difficult topics, often following the guidelines of official Toastmasters books. There are no actual instructors, so the books serve as a kind of curriculum for growth. In her advanced speech, she used audiovisual aids and incorporated audience participation.

Toastmaster Jewell Edney Rimas Zailskas

It was the holiday season, and Edney placed a gift-wrapped box on an easel. "I want everyone to remember the phrase, 'The Most Memorable Present,'" she told the crowd. She then relayed a childhood story of how she once woke up before everyone else on Christmas Day, opened a present, and was then spanked for her transgression. Despite the punishment, it was (cue crowd, everyone joins in) "The Most Memorable Present."

She then showed the crowd a newspaper article, which her brother sent her on the first anniversary of their mother's death. The article described how some family members effectively lose one another through "emotional unavailability." It was a speech about the importance of being there for the people you love, because one day, they might not be there anymore.

"You can't choose when death will come, or whether to pay taxes, but you can choose to become emotionally available," she told everyone. "We can give (cue crowd, everyone joins in again) "The Most Memorable Present."

Edney had everyone participating, and was later voted Best Speaker for the day. "Public speaking is about putting yourself out there," she said in an interview after the meeting. "You are using material from your own life, so in that way, and in the sense that you are in front of a bunch of people, you are letting yourself be vulnerable."

Of course, there was much more to the meeting.

Toastmaster Richard Day Rimas Zailskas

In "Table Topics," a different person each week picks topics on which members speak without any preparation. An "Ah Counter" kept track of "ahs," "ums" and other "filler words." At the end of the meeting, votes were tallied on the best speakers of the morning, and evaluations were given on everyone.

All this designed to foster a learning atmosphere, and seeming to work flawlessly. Indeed, it's very likely that, at this very moment, someone is delivering a sales pitch, or speaking in front of a board of directors, or persuading voters. It's also very likely that, at this very moment, someone is polishing his or her public speaking skills at a Toastmasters meeting.

Toastmaster Susan Stewart Rimas Zailskas